if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Randomize