we have pet lesbian snakes
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
