So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
