Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
