Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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