Kareoke will never be a sober sport
what day is it and did you see me today?
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize
