I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Randomize
