What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize