He is such a slut. More and more my type.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
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