im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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