if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize