Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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