Your face is a jimmy john
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
