I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
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