I like my sex mixed with concussions.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize