He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
