omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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