Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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