I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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