There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize