you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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