i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
honey bunches of taint.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
we're making bets on your personal life
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Randomize
