I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
