HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
