Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
