Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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