I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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