fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
We left an ass print on the piano.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Randomize
