I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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