Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
