Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize