I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
