I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
