you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize
