But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
