Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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