I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
whose parrot is this?
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
i out mim tonsoeep
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