So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Randomize
