She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
