ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
