But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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