I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
