you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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