Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize