I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
