2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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