And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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