I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Pooping to opera.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
