Having a random hookup so left but love u
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Randomize
