come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
