Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
